Author Archives: Katie

When Will This End?

I am so effing sick of being single. Now that we can do more and things are opening up, I’ve started to reach the stage of life where friends are always busy because they have things in their lives that I don’t.

I just turned thirty-seven, and soon I will be freezing my eggs. I had a couple of dates recently. One was really fun, but the guy isn’t interested in me. I went on two dates with another guy, but I don’t see a future with him.

I hate this. I hate dating. I hate feeling unloveable. It’s so easy for some people but it’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I just can’t seem to find anyone to spend my life with. I’m so lonely and I just want it to be over.

Things Are Getting Better

The pool is open.

I’m eating in restaurants again.

Masks are optional in most places.

In Massachusetts, almost 3/4 adults are fully vaxxed at this point. (Including me!)

I have a whole list of things I want to do. Restaurants. Minigolf. Bowling. Tea. Historical sites. Candlepin bowling. The beach. Karaoke. Fitness classes. Sporting events. Concerts.

I have always been an introvert, but I can feel myself becoming less introverted as things start to open up.

I still have another month of working from home.

The world around me, at least, is getting a bit better.

 

Song of the Moment: The Mother

For Mother’s Day, here’s this song from Brandi Carlile. I adore this song- it somehow manages to be both specific and universal. It’s about Brandi’s experience becoming a mother after the birth of her first daughter, Evangeline, but also about motherhood in general, and the ways it changes you. I love the last verse, which refers specifically to the experience of being a family with two moms:

You were not an accident where no one thought it through
The world has stood against us, made us mean to fight for you
And when we chose your name we knew that you’d fight the power, too
You’re nothing short of magical and beautiful to me
I would never hit the big time without you
So they can keep their treasure and their ties to the machine
Cause I am the mother of Evangeline

And here’s a cover of the song by the late Nick Cordero, whom I’ve written about here before. He sang this song at his show at 54 Below, which was held just about a year before he got sick. His wife was pregnant at the time of the concert and he was so excited about becoming a father. <3

 

These Challenging Times

Now that it’s been over a year since the pandemic started, I wanted to write about my own experience. It’s not unique, and this post isn’t really for other people as much as it is for me, and preserving my own memories.

We started hearing about the coronavirus in January of 2020, and

Song of the Moment: A Long December

I’m going to post more about this awful year and my experience with it. But for now, I’m going to post the song that I’d be posting on my AIM away message if this were the early 00s: “A Long December” by the Counting Crows.

It’s been a long December and there’s reason to believe

Maybe this year will be better than the last

This year has kind of felt like an eternal MARCH, so really it’s been more like a long March.

But we have vaccines that work. Trump is leaving the White House in 20 days.

There is, indeed, reason to believe that maybe this year will be better than the last.

A Probably Incomplete List of TV shows and Movies I Have Watched Since March 13

TV Shows

  • Tiger King
  • Alias Grace
  • Little Fires Everywhere
  • Unorthodox
  • Coronavirus, Explained
  • Schitt’s Creek
  • Dead to Me Season 2
  • Patriot Act with Hasan Minhaj
  • Full Frontal with Samantha Bee
  • Last Week Tonight with John Oliver
  • Dating Around Season 2
  • The Baby-Sitters Club
  • Pen15 Season 2
  • Indian Matchmaking
  • Little America
  • Defending Jacob
  • Unsolved Mysteries
  • Immigration Nation
  • The Vow
  • The Act
  • In My SKin
  • Succession
  • The Crown Season 4
  • The Queen’s Gambit

Movies

  • Between Two Ferns: The Movie
  • Miss Americana
  • Life Overtakes Me
  • American Factory
  • Come Sunday
  • The Two Popes
  • One of Us
  • Becoming
  • Behind the Curve
  • Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt: Kimmy vs. the Reverend
  • Spelling the Dream
  • Elizabeth
  • The Iron Lady
  • Hitch
  • Athlete A
  • Tootsie
  • Wadjda
  • The Artist
  • The Money Pit
  • Sleepless in Seattle
  • Melvin Goes to Dinner
  • The Social Dilemma
  • Cuties
  • I’m Thinking of Ending Things
  • The Devil All the Time
  • Horse Girl
  • What Keeps You Alive
  • The Addams Family
  • Possession
  • Diana: In Her Own Words
  • Parasite
  • Shirley
  • The Farewell
  • Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark
  • Downton Abbey movie
  • Knives Out
  • Harriet
  • Judy
  • A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood
  • The Lighthouse
  • Blow the Man Down
  • That Thing You Do!
  • Entertaining Angels: The Dorothy Day Story
  • A Hidden Life
  • The King of Staten Island
  • The Winslow Boy
  • I’ve Loved You So Long
  • Bright Star
  • What the Constitution Means to Me
  • Absentia
  • For Your Consideration
  • Vivarium
  • The Heretics
  • The House of the Devil
  • Satan’s Slaves
  • Finding Vivian Maier
  • The Decoy Bride
  • Haunt
  • Host
  • God Grew Tired of Us
  • Aladdin
  • The Lion King
  • Frozen 2
  • Hamilton
  • Star Wars
  • Monster
  • Big
  • And the Band Played On
  • Wit
  • All the Way
  • Capturing the Friedmans
  • Madagascar
  • Maria Full of Grace
  • Out of SIght
  • Jeff Who Lives at Home
  • Joe the King
  • Serendipity
  • Snakes on a Plane
  • Chicken Run
  • Coraline
  • Meet the Patels
  • American History X
  • Mamma Mia
  • A Very Long Engagement
  • Bad Teacher
  • Hilary and Jackie
  • Larry Crowne
  • Mystery Men
  • Beginners
  • Albert Nobbs
  • An Inconvenient Truth
  • Cars
  • Dancer in the Dark
  • Dinosaur
  • Dogma
  • Girl with a Pearl Earring
  • Liberty Heights
  • Mrs. Brown
  • One True Thing
  • Primary Colors
  • Prince Caspian
  • Quinceanera
  • Ten Inch Hero
  • The Adjustment Bureau
  • The End of the Affair
  • The Kid
  • The Muslims Are Coming
  • The Savages
  • The Secret Life of Bees
  • Thirteen Conversations About One Thing
  • Angels and Demons
  • The Great Buck Howard
  • Pyewacket
  • The Devil’s Doorway
  • I Trapped the Devil
  • Last Shift
  • You Should Have Left
  • The Way I See It
  • The Invisible Man
  • The Lodge

Comedy Specials

  • Fortune Feimster: Sweet and Salty
  • Ryan Hamilton: Happy Face
  • Seth Meyers: Lobby Baby
  • Hannah Gadsby: Douglas
  • Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill
  • Patton Oswalt: I Love Everything
  • Sarah Cooper: Everything’s Fine
  • All of John Mulaney’s specials about a zillion times

Why I’m Not Watching Sports This Year

My friend texted me today to say that BC was leading Clemson, the #1 college football team in the country, during their game, although Clemson ultimately did win.

But in another universe, Clemson’s starting quarterback would have been in, because he hadn’t tested positive for the coronavirus.

Back in March, all sports were suspended at first. Then gradually, they resumed again, with talk of testing and “bubbles.” But there’s been constant talk of players testing positive, particularly in baseball and college football, which happen to be the two sports I care the most about. After the Dodgers won the World Series earlier this week, this happened.

I know a lot of people who’ve welcomed the return of sports after a spring where ESPN had to show reruns and that Last Dance documentary series about Michael Jordan. It’s certainly a distraction from all the awful stuff going on. But I feel super weird about it. There’s the obvious issue of players and team staff being exposed to the coronavirus, but aside from that, there are players who should be playing who aren’t because they opted out. And it is so hard to ignore that the fans aren’t there watching the game in person. It all just feels…like it doesn’t count somehow. Like it’s a weird, practice season.

I don’t really know why THIS is what I decided to blog about this month. But here it is.